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Friday, August 15, 2008
31st july.. ord parade.. tough 1 more month to ord.. de parade is a memorable..sad in de same tym happy.. haha.. also my mum birthday..overall emo dat bah.
1st of aug- 14 aug.. alot of things happen.. i want to change into a better me.. till toay.. den i noe.. i got a happy family n i dun wan to lose any of them.. i noe its my fault.. i promise.. i will stand up again.. real soon.. im giving too much pressure to myself.. im muz learn to relax.. everything gonna be fine..
actually.. recently after sum reflection.. i find out dat.. i should hang out more wif ppl around de age of mine.. dere r really generation gap...n i find it hard to communicate.. i juz cant be myself.. if is to enjoy.. yah.. all of us can enjoy.. but when cum to serious tok.. its very hard..if 1 day i choose to give up anyone as my frenz.. i can onli say sorry.. like wad i say.. i hav change.. its my fault for putting too much effort into tis friendship n we hav come to a point dat its very hard to give up.. but sum things cant drag too long.. if tis carry on.. i will go mad 1 day.. not dat i dun wan to care for u anymore.. but.. im dun feel like myself when im wif u..i get irritated easily.. u can hav yr frenz.. i really dun mind.. last tym.. if u were to ask mi.. can tis friendship lasts.. i will say.. yes.. n its forever.. but if u were to ask mi now.. i dunno how to ans.. i dunnoo how to face u.. i dun want to hurt u.. i want u to be happy.. but by doing all these.. im de one whu is unhappy.. maybe a little more reflection is wad i nid..wad i wan is sumone whu i can share my probs wif.. but u r not de 1.. u may be listening but may not be understand wad im trying to say.. im tired.. i hav done my part.. i believe u did too.. but is de character dat give mi de feeling of giving up.. how i wish i can go back to de past.. juz be happy n joke around everything.. but de fact is i cant.. i hav come to a stage dat.. career is gonna de main thing in my life. dosent mean datt friend is no longer important but we got to see things in a different view le.. wad i wan is frenz whu really understand mi.. not by juz saying out.. but by action..like wad i say.. a little more reflection is all i nid.. i give myself a little more tym to decide.. n i would like to say again.. if i day .. i choose to give up.. not because im angry or wad.. im juz tired of putting a mask when i meet u.. i give myself till end of tis year.. next year.. im gonna start everything all over again.. i want to be myself.. hmm.. yeap.. last of all.. giving up is not easy cause both of us wil be hurt.. n i believe. if i do tis.. it is also a tym for u n also myself to be independent.. we hav to move on.. when u cum to my stage.. u will understand wad im trying to say.. i cannot confirm wif we can be as close as de past.. but there r really very meaningful n sweet memories.. yeap.. by saying all tis dosent mean i hav already cum out wif my ans.. but juz in case.. lols..ok.. i got to go n slp le.. tml still hav to run 14km.. kaox.. byee
ABOUTS
JOEY PEAR.
31OCT87
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